A Programmer and an Engineer

Joel will probably delete this thread, but FWIW, I got this off the straightwhiteguy.com blog:
A Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight
from LA to Paris. The Programmer leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game.

The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Programmer persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5."

Again, the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Programmer, now somewhat exasperated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"

This catches the Engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Programmer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"

The Engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Programmer. Now, it's the Engineer's turn. He asks the Programmer "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?"
The Programmer looks over at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail. After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50.

The Engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Programmer, more than a little miffed, shakes the Engineer and asks "Well, so what's the answer?"

Without a word, the Engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the Programmer $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.

Murkin (from Murka)
Wednesday, November 12, 2003

That is tremendous.

- Dave

Dave
Wednesday, November 12, 2003

The original version of this story has a smart city traveller driving through the country and stopping to talk to a dumb farmer. It's the farmer that walks away with the money while the smart city traveller scratches his head.

It's tedious to apply this to some fictitious distinction between engineer and programmer. Which just goes to show engineers really are boring.

(Speaking as one, sadly.)

.
Wednesday, November 12, 2003

"Which just goes to show engineers really are boring."

Hmm.  I thought that the moral of the story was that the engineer was the pragmatic one because he made an easy $40, got the programmer to shut up, and still had time for a nap.

Matt Latourette
Wednesday, November 12, 2003

I think it was meant to be that engineers are smarter. Ho hum.

.
Thursday, November 13, 2003

Four Microsoft programmers and four Linux programmers were travelling to a conference by train. The MS guys bought four tickets, and were amused to see the Linux guys only buy one.

"Can't aford the fare?", laughed one.

"Watch," said one of the Linux guys.

When they were on the train and saw the ticket collector approach the MS people sat back smugly in their seats to see what happened. The Linux guys calmly got up and went to the toilet cubicle. When the ticket collector knocked on the door and said "Ticket please!" they told him to wait, then slid their ticket under the door which was duly returned by the collector.

"Wow! That was amazing!" said the MS guys as they looked at one anothe. Silently, they knew what they would do on the return trip.

On the return trip they were surprised to see that the Linux guys didn't buy any ticket at all. The Linux guys just winked while one of the MS programmers bought a ticket.

The same thing happened again. The ticket collector was seen to be coming and so the Linux guys left their seats. The MS programmers did the same and hid in the nearest toilet cubicle.

Then one of the Linux programmers knocked on the door and said "Ticket please!"

Thursday, November 13, 2003

It's 1989, and a programmer is driving to MacHack to give a presentation on getting Mac applications to run under BSD on MC68040 Risc CPUs.

He stops in a diner for dinner. He's bored, there're only two other people in the place, so he asks the waitress "would you like to hear a joke about DOS programmers?"

She glares at him, affronted. "Look," she explains, "I'm waitressing to put myself through school to learn to be a PC programmer!"

"And you see those two burly truckers? They're PC programmers too!" Our programmer sees that the other patrons are muscular and don't appear too friendly.

"And Cookie in the back? He's a PC programmer and he's eager to use his knives on any smart-ass who has too much to say."

"Now," she finishes, both hands on her hips, "did you say you wanted to tell me a joke about PC programmers?"

Our programmer shakes his head, wiping his mouth on a napkin.

"You're right, no point really. I'd have to repeat the punch line too many times."

Reginald Braithwaite-Lee
Thursday, November 13, 2003

Totally anal-retentive, nitpick:
MC68040 is a quintessential CISC CPU, not RISC.

I have no life beyond reading JOS for nits
Thursday, November 13, 2003

Dear witty nit:

I actually know that, having written 680x0 ASM code. To compound my sloppiness, I didn't bother to check whether BSD for Macintosh actually runs on 68K, what subjects were discussed at MacHack in 1989, and for that matter whether anybody except Microsoft actually can make a living writing software applications for PCs.

:-)

http://www.braithwaite-lee.com/

Reginald Braithwaite-Lee
Friday, November 14, 2003

The Revolution's come and with it public hangings are back.

Today there are three to get the drop, a lawyer, a priest and an engineer.

The lawyer goes first and then they have the drumroll and pull the handle but the trapdoor doesn't open. They're about to try again when the lawyer pipes up about double jeapordy and inhumane punishments and reluctantly they let him go.

The priest goes next and the same thing happens. He goes on his knees to praise God for having sent a sign to these unbelievers and is also set free.

Then it's the engineer's turn. Just as they are about to pull the lever he pipes up "Hold on there! I think I've found out what's wrong with your contraption".

Stephen Jones
Sunday, November 16, 2003

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