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I really enjoy the advices on software I've been getting here and I'm wondering what websites people here go to for tips and discussions of living a full, meaningful, and well-balanced life. Work is just a part of my life and I want to improve the rest of me too. :) Thanks!

Wednesday, May 29, 2002


Wednesday, May 29, 2002

You have a life? WOW! What's it like?

Jack lives over there -->
Thursday, May 30, 2002

Ride cross country on a bicycle.  In 8 years my youngest hits college.  It'll be my turn then.

Nat Ersoz
Thursday, May 30, 2002

The great thing about living in britain is that a ride across the country only needs the week off.

We even have a cycle path being completed just for that purpose.

Of course, finding a dry week to do it in is a different matter.

Ged Byrne
Thursday, May 30, 2002

The great thing about bicycling across Britain is that there is a pub every four it might take a year!

Thursday, May 30, 2002

The best life advice can be found at

:-) Enjoy!

Tim Sullivan
Thursday, May 30, 2002

Thursday, May 30, 2002

I'm not sure about sites on improving your health but this one can improve your outlook: . When you step out the door at 14k feet all the worries you had seem trivial. I think putting life in perspective is important to growing.

Nat, my daughter goes to college (hopefully<g>) in 8 years also. I can relate to the feeling looking forward to some time for myself.

Ian Stallings
Thursday, May 30, 2002

(that's a joke)

Thursday, May 30, 2002

Why do we have good practices in software development? So that we can have free time to pursue other meaningful and fulfilling activities in our lives.  What constitutes meaningful activities? Figuring out what they are and how they should be integrated with the rest is the joyful and painful task that we should undertake.

Whatever they may be, if they don't transform us, then they are not that meaningful (learning something new and challenging > mindlessly watching TV).

Check out for a start.

Bob Yu
Thursday, May 30, 2002

"Check out for a start."

It has "The End of Sex, Golf, and The Ultimate Athlete" as keywords ...
maybe I'll get that ATL programming book afterall...

Thursday, May 30, 2002

Hum, maybe ??

Or for teasing your brain :-)

Philippe Back
Friday, May 31, 2002

The "website" I go to is my local library, its all there in words, by people (mostly dead)  who have already been through what we are all going through now.
History repeats itself.

Friday, May 31, 2002

History never repeats itself,
but it does rhyme. -Mark Twain.

Doug Withau
Friday, May 31, 2002

I agree with Tony. Even better than the local library is to a good friend's house, or out to dinner, or perhaps even to a long lunch.

I learned from Zen master Charlotte Joko Beck (who wrote at least two very good books), that the hardest thing to accept about life is that there's nothing wrong with it. Your life is perfect the way it is.

Friday, May 31, 2002

Charlotte Joko Beck obviously never saw my life! :)

Friday, May 31, 2002

Thank you Doug (and Mark) - so true.

Friday, May 31, 2002

If I had listened to the likes of Charlotte Joko Beck, I never would have quit drinking and using cocaine.

Zen is a crock.

Anonymous coward
Friday, May 31, 2002

This book really helped me get a grip on things.  It looks like a run-of-the-mill self-help book, but it's actually based on sound basic research and clinical studies:

Ward Stradlater
Friday, May 31, 2002

My personal favourite:

Although it's more about Life, the Universe and Everything. You have to fully read it to understand what's it all about, because at first glance all the topics they cover seem to have nothing to do with improving your life. But they do.

Shlomi Fish
Saturday, June 1, 2002

Neo-tech?  What is this -- a (marginally) more subtle version of the Church of the Sub-Genius?

Anonymous coward
Saturday, June 1, 2002 will help you relieve yourself (literally) of all the tension ;)

Sunday, June 2, 2002

I think too many people complain about things when their life is essentially fine. They obviously don't see it - otherwise they wouldn't be complaining.

Cocaine and alcohol are forms of escapism. A way of coping with what you perceive to be as the problems of life. I think if you felt that you're life was perfect as it was, you wouldnt've have done those things.


I've skimmed Feeling Good and talked to people who read it. It seems to be a very good book. I don't know anyone who it's worked for, but then these people never applied the principles from the book.

For example, part of it centers on Cognitive Distortions - ways you warp the 'story' of your life. If you can recognize these and control them, you'd be much better off. One Cognitive Distortion is called Mind Reading. You can't know what someone else is thinking, so stop telling yourself they're somehow judging you.

I had to attend a funeral on Sunday and we were 15 minutes late. I didn't want to walk into the church because I was convinced everyone would judge me. I mean, what kind of a way to pay your respects is that?

Of course when I showed up, everything was fine. People were happy to see me, and the immediate family was sitting too close to the front to know when I arrived anyway. Besides, they were just happy I was there at all, and I caught all the important parts.

See how Cognitive Distortions can make you miserable even when there's nothing to be miserable about? I was worrying needlessly. That's the kind of thing that fills Feeling Good.


The most life-changing book I've read in recent years would have to be After the Ecstacy the Laundry by Jack Kornfield. I had a desire to escape to some sort of monestary until I read this book.

The title pretty much says it all - even the most spiritually advanced people have to deal with life, take care of the kids and pay the bills.


In my personal opinion, one of the worst things we have to deal with is not realizing everyone else goes through the same things we do. The same day to day struggles, the same fears and apprehensions. We just see the face they put on to get them through the day.

Some people are able to express their own trials and tribulations in such a way as to help us realize that they have the same problems that we do. Some autobiographical fiction writers, for example. Kerouac, Natalie Goldberg and David Eggers spring to mind as writers I've read that do this. Oh the new Lauryn Hill album. The music isn't great, but the things she says...

Monday, June 3, 2002

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